Happy Wed, my day off!!

I'm starting to see light at the end of the sickness tunnel, my voice is about half back and I can go about a hour without coughing my lungs out.  I've been cleaning my mom's house on Wednesdays to get money for Marcus Birthday/Christmas presents, I'm so excited about them, even more so now that we have a baby on the way! 
I keep telling myself the baby is good and growing, but I still don't believe it, maybe all first time mom's go through this, I've just read and heard of a lot of stories of miscarriage or something going wrong, I guess it's my self defence mode just not thinking it's real, but I already want to paint and get the room ready, I want to start making things, but I haven't let myself because I don't want it to turn out bad.  Maybe this is bad, but I know me, if I let myself believe all is well and  I get super super excited, then I'll just fall apart, if things didn't work out. 
Marcus keeps waiting to tell our family and I just keep thinking let's wait til our first Dr. appointment and we can hear the heart beat!!!  I can't wait for that day!!  3 more weeks!!  I'm 5 weeks tomorrow, so the heart is just starting to beat this week!!  wow how amazing is that!! 
Troy just sent me a picture text!! he's looking so good!! I need to get better so I can hold him and tell him my stories and how much I love him!!  Hopefully in the next day or so!!
My still trying to decide if I should go to the dr today or not, If I should just check and make sure, I still have cramps and aches but not so strong on that side, I think I'll wait to see if they come back or not, I've been ready a lot of line and sounds like cramping is pretty common for first time moms. 
Well I better get somethings done, I might start my first baby project today, we'll see!!!  Maybe I'll post pictures, I got some things this summer at garage sales for our future baby cause I knew that would be the cheapest way to go!!  I have a dresser, a shelf, and a rocking chair all of which I want to sand and paint!!!  I think Ill just do white for them all and so the bedding or decorations can be different colors!!